Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Like Really?





Looks like I was un-friended for not liking her likeable pictures.
Going by the social media tradition, if you don't click the 'like' button on my posts, I will un-follow you. You un-follow, I shove you on the restricted list. You shove me on the restricted list, I un-friend you. You un-friend me, I block you. A blow for a blow. 

Sometimes perceptions of ourselves are built more on 'likes' and retweets. Lately, I find that the ‘Like’ button is losing its likability among like-minded people. There was a time when you were a nobody unless a hundred ‘Likes’ popped up on your update. Not anymore. Overall, I sense Facebook and blogging fatigue. Do you?

Moreover, youngsters detest the fact that oldies have captured their sacred turf – Facebook, Twitter, Instagram. A US based social media analysis says, “Facebook is the third-oldest social platform, behind Yelp and LinkedIn, with only 20 percent of its users under 24”. Going by this study, I can totally see myself as a pestering Aunty. Almost Mataji-ish. I wouldn’t blame the young for abandoning social media and moving towards dating apps like Tinder.

Now that the ‘Likes’ are not the same like before, the Urban Dictionary tells me about a flirting option on Instagram called ‘Deep Liking’. This is where you scroll through personal photo collections of your muse and ‘Deep Like’ the pictures as a sign of interest. For the ignorant, ‘Deep Liking’ is like Chetan’s Half Girlfriend. It is an emotion stronger than ‘like’ but not as strong as ‘love’. Get it? No? Ignoramus, looks like you are above forty. 
Urban Dictionary also tells me that ‘Deep Like’ is a way to say ‘love’ while avoiding cheesiness. Frankly, to me, this ‘Deep Like’ looks exactly that - cheesy. And creepy. See, its fine when teens ‘Deep Like’ pictures on Instagram. Given that we are an emotional Shaukeen nation, what if we end up ‘Deep Liking’ everything that has boobs? It can be traumatic for some.

Far away from the digital age, I belong to a generation where any fascination for the opposite gender was expressed via Archies cards, song requests and awkward questions, ‘Can we be friends?’ Back then, being a friend was special - unlike the present times where a virtual friend’s pet dog can also send you a friend request. Of course, flirting with a ‘Deep Like’ button is insanely easy compared to risking a tight slap from the girl. In all likelihood, this button is called ‘Deep Like’ because it takes a lot of patience and dedication to scroll past scores of pictures. Today, in the digital age, 'Deep Liking' is like writing handwritten love letters. Imagine the pain of actually finding a pen, straining the carpals while writing legible alphabets, occasionally checking the dictionary, sealing the envelope, licking images of national icons in order to paste them and traveling long distances to find a letter box!
But times have changed. Like, really. So even if you feel that I sound like Sunehri from Dhoom - like a dumbo, do like the post on social media. 
Did you just ‘Deep Like’ it? Let’s leave that to the teens.
 Like is good. 
Trust TOI to tell us all about Deep Liking

83 comments:

  1. Deep like? Really?! I was ignorant! And true, nowadays everything seems to be a rat race.

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    1. I was unaware until TOI told me about it.

      Delete
  2. I can't get over the Deep Like. Sounds like a blow job to me. Eww

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  3. What Facebook needs is a "Who cares" button :P Social media is such a wo(u)nderful place!

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    1. You are a geek, go ahead and install it. Let me know how to go about it.
      I like Who Cares!

      Delete
  4. Haaaa Haaaa Haaa. I can sense the irritation beneath the humor Alka.
    Deep like. Really? Honestly sounds ridiculous to me. But then I am the old fashioned sorts who actually believe in having a face to face conversation rather than proclaiming affection over the social media.
    I wonder what Facebook would come up with something in response to Instagram’s Deep Like :-P Perhaps a heart sign instead of a thumbs up !

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Trust TOI to tell me about this stupid Deep Like thing.

      Delete
  5. I am facing that burnout with FB. I wonder what my adolescent son thinks of all this "childish" behavior from adults. Likes and everything else virtually must be taken with a pinch of salt. And overt affections on FB give me the shudders. I am distrustful of people who are too sugary sweet. :)Deep like sounds obscene, truly!

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    1. True, obscene is the word. Trust TOI to tell me about it.

      Delete
  6. Really? Deep like? It shows how old gen I am becoming... But seriously, I do burnout. I think it depends on the phase you are in. Sometimes you like it and sometimes you hate it.. but yes, Like does not have the same meaning now :)

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    1. I am going through a confusing phase ...I need a break from social media.

      Delete
  7. Deep Like??? Sounds really weird. But then I am almost mid-century so it doesn't really matter what I think about the "deep thinking" that goes into analyzing and improvising social media rankings and popularity. I actually find myself reducing the number of "friends" every few months on my FB account because I don't want random people to "like" my updates or links - which may or may not be about the real me ;) just because they have the option to do so. Anyway, this was quite a likable, hilarious take on wanting to be liked and like others in the virtual world. It doesn't matter whether in real world the "likers" and "liked" would even be able to stand each other, as long as they and their updates are virtually likable all is fine and dandy in the world.

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    1. Random people liking pictures is creepy so I have changed privacy settings. But we bloggers need social media to share our blog posts. Thank you for Liking. :)

      Delete
  8. Ha ha ! Hilarious ! Didn't even know there was a concept called 'Deep Like' and I am just flirting with my 40s :D
    I really like liked your post and you did remind of Sunehri ! I liked Sid's Who Cares.. only thing is if I use, I will be un-friended before I can say whoca... and then it would rather defeat the purpose of being social..

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    1. Ha ha, yes looks like social norms demand that we continue to like like minded people regardless of something we dislike.

      Delete
  9. That's an interesting post, Alka.
    To be honest, before I started blogging I never saw people giving so much importance to unfriending, unfollowing, blocking, etc. I guess since we are all part of a similar 'profession' it keeps the idea of comparing ranks and readers ever-present between us. Also, unless it was someone very close to me, it never bothers me ever if a blogger decides to delete/block/restrict me. After all, how much do we know each other? Any body can suddenly wake-up to their privacy and it's completely fine. Of course, it does matter if what was once called friendship suddenly goes missing without bothering to talk it out, but then again, better broken than forced, no? Relationships, real world or virtual, are dynamic.
    As for 'deep like', well, what can I say except it sounds cheesy and perhaps will be used without being meant. On the other hand, who are we to think that between A and B it isn't meant. Can we ever say, sitting many PC screens away?
    FB makes us make everyone's lives our own. And vice versa. That's the intrinsic quality of this site. And that is why we love it one day and hate it on another.
    'Like' seems to have become a 'Seen' more than 'Like it' actually. But please know that when I read your posts it means exactly what it is supposed to.
    Good post!

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    Replies
    1. I get what you say Sakshi. We cant think about virtual friends all the time. There is life beyond blogging and social media.
      But if its someone close to me, it bothers me when the other person stops responding. I don't mind if they stop reading my blog. That's not important.But IF I get a sense that they don't wish to interact, I think about it like a sensitive idiot.
      Yes, Like is more of a Seen because people seem to Like posts about unfortunate incidents too...As you say, its dynamic. I know you write from the heart. And I never miss your updates and posts for your discerning eye for detail and an ear for nuance.Like honestly :)

      Delete
    2. I think about such severances so much that I'm being taught how not to. :) I understand what you mean.
      Much like serial killers, there are serial 'likers' too. At least it tells us who not to take seriously.
      Very happy to know why you like to read me.

      Delete
  10. Never knew "like" can go so deep :p
    I love the way you commented on tomfoolery of social media with its own devices.
    It's always a pleasure to read you and then like it. It deserves that :)

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    1. Good to see you here Jyoti, like truly.

      Delete
  11. I need a few buttons on facebook..Like 'Get a Life' , 'Enough with the pictures already', 'Stop being so sarcastic'...and more! These days I mostly use facebook to track blog posts! It has become my reader of sorts..

    And don't even get me started about the FB 'LIKE' Sagas!! uff!

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    1. If we become honest and transparent about our feelings on social media, it will become unsocial media, no?

      Delete
  12. Deep Like? Never heard of this before.
    Let me check

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    Replies
    1. Don't bother Chowla Sir, it's just a teen fad.

      Delete
  13. This 'like' thing eats up my precious time,which i don't relish, so i seldom indulge in it.

    There is a huge difference between virtual friends with whom i feel a sort of kinship or rapport,whom i want to rad; and those who befriend me with the sole purpose of having me like their pages?I used to mechanically like them in my mail but now i have been toying with the idea of unliking them to reduce the load.I have never visited those pages,yet i do not want to tread on toes.

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    1. These are irrelevant fads.....technology changes so fast that we will forget about this in no time.

      Delete
  14. Came here via Sid's sharing of your post. Very well written and so true. Regarding the facebook like, I'm inclined to agree with Rachna that it has had its heyday. Between you and me, I hope the fascination that is Facebook will die a slow death before my daughter starts using the Net. As for Deep Like, the lesser said the better. 😉

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    1. Your first time here? You are indeed special Shailaja and I owe Sid one.
      Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. Really appreciate it. Like really.

      Delete
  15. What the.....? Deep like? they will soon have deep lick also probably....I always wished FB had a 'dislike' button next to the like button. I would have pressed a dislike for every single nostrils peeping selfies...and yeh Tinder kya hai? never heard of it...thank god, I am stuck in the good old times of archies cards like you who graduated to FB and stuck there...and the follow, un follow thing is so true

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    1. Ha ha....I came to know about Tinder from my son. And for the rest there is The Times Of India!
      Nostril peeping selfies....can't stop laughing.

      Delete
  16. I like a post only if I like its content. It's got nothing to do with the person. I am out of sync with the times?

    Destination Infinity

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    1. No, you are perfectly in sync. Most sensible folks do that.

      Delete
  17. Things are changing far more rapidly than what they did just about a decade ago, so it the shelf life of things is becoming too short including am sure 'deep like ' will soon be taken over by a still deeper version:)

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    1. True, technology is so dynamic in the present digital age.

      Delete
  18. Hahaha. I deep like this post like from the bottom of my heart.

    On the other hand, there are some aspects of social media that deserve a place in the heart of our bottoms. :p

    Cheers
    CRD

    ReplyDelete
  19. As much as I hate to say it, I haven't heard of something called 'Deep Like'. Is this really true? I feel so old, this children's day. Those carefree days seem to have been a reality, a century ago. Sigh. Right now. I want to scream like Joey did in FRIENDS saying that he had a pact and God broke it.

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    1. Trust the Times of India to tell me about Deep Like and make me feel old. Since its not a good idea to suffer alone, i made all the readers feel old. Wicked me!!

      Delete
  20. Your post made me sad. It reminded me that accepting a friend request from a virtual friend's pet is no guarantee that its master will continue to like you, let alone deep like!

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    Replies
    1. You haven't recovered from the shock, yet.
      Time, they say, heals all.
      :)

      Delete
  21. I have never heard of deep like. Looks like i am getting old.

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    1. Ash, the Times of India told me about Deep Like and make me feel old. Since its not a good idea to suffer alone, i made all the readers feel old. Wicked me!

      Delete
  22. Yes. I wonder there are how many people in the world who wake up in the middle of the night and has nothing to do but just to fiddle with the phone, to check their notifications, tweets or stuffs... when on one social media is a window to the world of meeting new people knowing more things beyond our see, it indeed is also a threat to our usual lifestyle... sigh! the way we post how we eat, what we are eating and the rest... It somehow gives the feeling of self consciousness which in other words can also be self restrictions. beautifully written is this piece. 😊

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  23. hahaha.brilliant post, I tell you. Deep Like :D

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    1. NOOOOO....didn't I mention something about not Deep Liking?

      Regardless, thanks for reading. And liking. Like truly.

      Delete
    2. That is why, I mentioned. The reverse of reverse... u see? :D

      Delete
  24. But if Facebook is just a validation of your awesomeness, it makes sense to unfriend/block virtual friends who have a contrary opinion. You don't like my pictures=you don't like me=you are jealous of my beauty, wit and intelligence=I hate you.

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    1. Purba, the essence is not to take all the Likes and Blockings to heart. Just care about a handful who really matter.

      Delete
  25. Gah. I feel old. Totally from the era of Archies cards and Rajesh Khanna Romantic hits.
    Only yesterday I read someone say "Is this that really awesome movie that you said you can't wait wait to watch? Also, can I borrow the books from you, since you've highly recommended the series?". This is the era where porn sells calling itself literature, so I guess, deep like kis khet ki mooli hai.

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    1. Ahh, Kishore Rajesh magic!!
      All tech trends are dynamic but social media trends are fickle. Stupid too - like Deep Like.

      Delete
  26. This 'deep like' makes my enthusiasm dip like mercury in Antarctica. Antarctica because Delhi is too inconsistent to fit in the phrase.
    But, I've found that if I can maintain an amicable distance from these social networks, which is not totally in, but not exactly without, I don't feel any hard feelings for those who engage in these rituals. Safe to say, most of them will outgrow it, since life, happens.

    Cheers,
    Blasphemous Aesthete

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    Replies
    1. You are doing the right thing by maintaining a healthy distance. But then you were always the sorted types! Like, truly.

      Delete
  27. I so love the first picture. I was thinking a few days back, how do teens express love these days? In our days, it was cards, messages through common friends and boy, the charm of missed calls in the night. I wonder what they do, check source code to see who visited their profile. About Facebook likes, like what you like and tell people block/unfriend/restrict me, my rule is simple.

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    1. One shouldn't take Facebook seriously unless one is a teen. As an impressionable teen, all the Likes and Dislikes come with the territory. Your rule is like really cool.

      Delete
  28. ThiS 'DEEP LIKING' thing sent shudders down my spine. WHAT THE HELL. What times are we living in!!!!!
    I was unfriended by 3 college girls last week. One of the had messaged me to like her profile picture and I didnt.

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    1. OMG, like really? Are they college girls or school girls?

      Delete
  29. "This is where you scroll through personal photo collections of your muse and ‘Deep Like’ the pictures as a sign of interest."

    Should the word "scroll" be replaced with "troll" it would be nearer the truth. We're just replacing old words for new. The Creepiness Quotient remains about the same.

    How come I haven't followed you yet? Silly me!

    ReplyDelete
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    1. You said it! Troll is the word.
      Better late than never. The loss is mine.
      Good to see you here.

      Delete
  30. I have like stopped worrying about Social media friendships in toto, Alka! Finding it tough enough to keep up with all my real life friends :) All of whom sort of 'Deep Like' me :)

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    1. Yeah, true.
      After the initial euphoria of social media, I too am Deep Liking the real friends.

      Delete
  31. Deep Like!! that seriously that's a term!! I might be really old for never having heard this term. What all these youngsters invent? I loved the good old days of archies card and teddy bears and roses :D

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Oops, this post is making almost everyone feel old!
      :)

      Delete
  32. hahah! this is the new fad of FB and soon will be replaced by some other funky or cheesy term. btw I really do not understand how do people spend their entire day on social n/w platforms like FB and wattzapp..they drive me crazyyyy esp the mammoth task of remembering and managing so many passwords :P

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    1. It's a passing fad. Technology is dynamic.

      Delete
  33. I know, Alka!!! The likes and unlikes, pokes and un-friending on FB. I took two months break from FB and simply de-activated the account coz it was getting to my head too much. I am sure its expiry date will come. Yeah! There have been instances where people unfriended me and pehle, I may feel bad but not nemore...hehe. I mean, I am beyond this whole thingy. In fact, better off, I feel.
    Sometimes back, I wrote something and do lemme know
    http://vishalbheeroo.wordpress.com/2014/10/31/un-apologetically-non-selfie-in-world-of-fb-addicts/

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Makes sense to look at social media dispassionately.
      Will check your post.

      Delete
  34. Deep Like ! I enjoy my time on Facebook ...but each day I think it is not for people like me...Facebook is taken over my fake pouts and duck faces and people have forgotten to pose for pics with their tongues in. No I am not going to Deep Like anyone's tongue :D

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  35. Deep Like??? I mean....how obscene! I an totally imagine the double meaning conversations teens would have after hitting such buttons or gossiping about it ! Eww....gives me the creeps!
    But loved your humor Alka :)

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  36. Ha ha! Loved this post- or perhaps I just "liked it"? :)

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  37. One of the reasons I am slowly weaning away from the FB culture. I just don't want the world to know what I told Tom.....as simple as that.
    Another funny aspect I noticed was that if anyone posts a sad news, lets say Mr so and so has expired, there are 48 "likes" for it within no time. What does it mean? That 48 people like the fact that Mr so and so is dead?

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  38. I am not sure, but I guess a lot of people on Social Media are not mature enough to understand how things work. They want to have fun and have their own ways and means of doing it. For instance, I hate it when someone asks for help and some people like the status. Totally out of context!

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    1. Like is more of a seen, Ashwini. It's losing its relevance with mindless clicking.

      Delete
  39. I remember the Nirulas ice cream "Kuch Nahin". Maybe you know about it.
    Nobody, by the way, is logical. Brains and no body.
    I still cannot comment on the compositions of Shiv-Hari. Masters. I now know the reason why I don't receive comments on my blog. And honestly I am jealous of you for getting so many comments.

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    1. Thank you for being honest. The number of comments are an outcome of blogging regularly for almost five years and engaging with my readers. Being an introvert, this is where I find my voice.

      Delete
  40. I "like" the Nobody joke you have shared at the beginning, Alka :)
    Seriously, I'm so sick & tired of the likes business!
    People compete for likes!
    One person shared about his dad's demise & friends 'liked' it...
    That's why I have stayed away from FB.
    Lovely points. Nicely shared :)

    ReplyDelete